Should guys make the first move? 🧔

Yes 100%. Well I would like a girl to cause it’s easier, but I’d do it if I have to

I think the first initiative is important, but I don't think it should be a standard always

Why make it complicated? If you're interested, initiate contact or ask for a date, no matter whether you are male or female. For me it doesn't really matter, and it certainly doesn't put me off if a woman takes initiative.

Some great comments on here :) For me, personally, I would prefer the man to make the first move in terms of asking me on a date. Having said that however I’ve definitely initiated conversations with a guy if I’m interested in them but I’ve never asked any guy on a date. Once I start a conversation they can then decide if they want to take it any further or not :)

Yes! It's biblical

Yes but helpful if women sit near them.

With all the ghosting that I have personally experienced, @Isabel - Team SALT , why would I? I'm starting to form the view that making the first move is somewhat futile. If a lady were to make the first move, at least I'd know that she was, at the very least, interested in chatting.

Always

💯

There is something very attractive about a man who takes the initiative 🔥

It’s perhaps easier with online, but in person there can be a lot to lose from asking a woman out - especially if there is an established friend group or you’re in the same church, where things can become awkward. Whether IRL on online, there needs to be some indication of compatibility (interests, views etc) so there has to be healthy communication prior to asking out. Also, it seems that women are told not to “settle” whilst men to be open and not “overlook”, which feels like double standards…

I think both sides should be intentional about their approach. I'm more traditional and believe that the man should initiate the pursuit. As ladies, I also feel that we may invite the man so that he feels encouraged that his efforts and feelings will be reciprocated. Nothing like chasing a woman that doesn't know what she wants. We still need to exercise wisdom. I've unintentionally invited a man to pursue by being supportive or kind and it caused confusion for both sides.

Always made a first move/comment/like, had next to no replies, now what? 🤷🏽‍♂️ It's hard to do so, and it's very discouraging and annoying. Interaction should work both ways and not rely on the one side to do something.

It feels nice if a lady makes the first move too. It is hard as it is to have to guess if someone likes another person. Guys get rejected all the time and can be tiring too

It is our duty has woman to position ourselves to he found. One of which way is by reaching out to a guy and saying something nice. Hopefully if he is interested he will reply. If not I just keep it moving. Sorry but I am not getting any younger and I don't have time to waste.

I don't mind reaching out to a guy and letting him know his online profile was interesting etc. But I will probably only say as little as that, so he knows that I exist on this earth or in other words on this dating app or whichever one I am on. It is up to him to go read my profile and message me back if the Holy Spirit leads him to do so. Remember Proverbs 18:22 He who finds a wife. The woman is meant to be found, she is not the finder.

He who fine a wife, fine a good thing and obtain favour from the Lord. but the love should be reciprocal, and the woman should show if she is interested or not.

I don't mind making the first move, but I'm not going to chase. Be clear with your intentions. We're not getting any younger🤷‍♂️

The bible doesn't say either way. E.g. Thou must wait to be asked on a coffee date. God's the ultimate initiator of all things. Colossians 1:16

I believe it's easier for men as well if a woman take few steps and then man approaching her. But it shouldn't be a norm that only men should approach. It's nice if a woman approaches a guy without keeping ego aside. It's simple and clear for both the genders.

If you’re interested just say so.. kind of sick of the cat and mouse stuff.

Ladies should give signs of interest and men should make the first move. It’s not WRONG that ladies ask a man out, but I don’t recommend it because of future consequences to the structure of the relationship created . It starts in the wrong dynamics .. and when it does, usually it continues like that. Never had good results for me, so now I avoid it to the most…

I guess Men should make the first move but I’m not against those ladies who do

I mean yes what's the worst thing that The person you're going to make the move on says no

Honestly I would prefer it if guys made the first move, however, I know some people are shy so if I’ve not had a message after a match I’ll send one just in case, but it seems quite common for people to match and then not talk to you which seems strange to me 🤷‍♀️

I wouldn't have a problem making the first move

for suree🙏🏼💪

Yes

There's no right answer to this question. The reason I say this, 1) men want to pursue but it's not the fact that we're always afraid too it's for a plethora of reasons for example we're in constant competition with a vastly large group of men so that deturs us, we get put off asking because of what today's "feminism" has created that makes men feel like they're constantly walking on eggshells and then there are those that are shy and aren't sure how to approach woman or take rejection...

When I first started on the app I used to like the male profiles I was interested in, but I didn't have peace doing that so switched to waiting to see who comes up in my like list and then open a match if its mutual. Again I won't message first I'll wait and see if they want to step forward and go from there. Not saying thats for everyone this is just how the Lord guided me

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Yes

I agree with you. Some guys who are very shy simply do not sense the woman’s interest. God bless with your search.

Yes

Yes. It's biblical. Lol Men should pursue.

Are we playing chess or checkers?

When it comes to displaying interest on apps like this, I don’t think it makes a difference who reaches out first. The guy may never even see a possible future match’s profile unless she expresses interest first. Just my opinion, though ❤️

Personally I think it’s better if the male makes the first move after the woman shows interest, eg matching or another way if it’s in person.

I don't think there's anything wrong with females making the first move (in fact I think this would benefit very shy and introverted men). I too have sometimes sent the first message once matching with a guy (although only if I haven't heard from them after a day 😆). However, I am usually quite traditional and would prefer the man to lead as whenever I have thought about pursuing men in general something in my spirit hasn't felt quite right.

It would be if she made the 1st move sometimes😅. It can be hard to tell if someone is interested or not every now and then.

It’s nice if they do but doesn’t always have to be the case!

I study psychology at Harvard University and have spent ~10,000 hours dating (the number that technically makes someone an expert). There’s an absolute need for the man to seek and chase. If he doesn’t, he isn’t interested. There’s nothing “wrong” with a woman asking/messaging - yet if you need to, the man likely needs to discover his God and himself more before he dates. Let the man lead. Reassure, yet let him lead 🙏

This question is too ambiguous. There are a lot of differences between people who do match. Different church denomination, different ages, different culture depending on the state you were born. Sometimes people like to talk, sometimes they are shy. And there are people who simply don't think you're interesting, you simply don't match their expectations this goes for both man and women. They somehow know you're not "the one" even before some deep connection or conversation.

Honestly, dating is hard enough, so there is no need to overthink it. I think both men and women should just approach someone if they are interested and not sabotage themselves with arbitrary expectations of how things should be done.

I think what is most important is the intention. While guys may be thinking it is their job to make the first move. Men must stop and think what are my intentions to connect either this other person

Personally I feel like who makes the first move shouldn’t/doesn’t matter because it doesn’t go against God’s word for a girl to make the first move either. Except the Holy Spirit says otherwise either the guy or girl can/should make the first move.